Well, what a week it’s been! You hadn’t noticed? The ­outrage surely didn’t pass you by, did it? A brazen show of cleavage on breakfast TV?! And you didn’t bat an eyelid?

I’m not saying it’s brazen, by the way, but when Susanna Reid wore a green V-neck dress, or as the outraged would have it a dress with a “plunging neckline” to present Good Morning Britain on Wednesday, there were plenty of puce-faced viewers who, having already choked on their cornflakes, thought it was.

And they clearly had plenty of time on their hands, as they picked up the phone and complained in their droves. Apparently some poor souls, according to the headlines, were “distracted by the very low-cut green, silk dress”, while others were apparently “wowed” by it.

Susanna, as always, kept a cool front, but you really have to feel for the poor buggers who were “SHOCKED” by it, don’t you? Reaching for the tranquillisers on spotting a cleavage while eating their cornflakes? What is wrong with people?

It’s not Susanna and her breasts at fault, it’s a continuing ­sexualisation of women’s body parts. Female breasts, I have to admit, are the most magnificent things, especially when they’re doing what they were made for (handily feeding little babies, any time, anywhere, for those who have no idea).

Holly Willoughby breastfed her children and she too was the subject of “outrage” this week. Viewers of Sunday’s Dancing on Ice didn’t like her dress, either. Aw, poor things.

There were people enraged enough, apparently, to complain to Ofcom, the TV regulators. What? Yes, really.

The poor, ­righteous but angry souls were offended by Holly’s cleavage, with some poor, ­blinkered and very angry souls actually claiming it was “obscene” for a pre-watershed show.

Calm down, everyone. Calm down. Used for what they’re made for – women’s breasts are life-giving.

There’s nothing obscene in that.

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