Great Britain

My wife is so busy with work that she doesn’t have time for our kids

DADDY DAY CARE

DEAR DEIDRE: WORK demands mean that my wife sometimes doesn’t see our kids for days.

I’m a stay-at-home dad of 37. My wife is 35 and a care home manager. She’s been incredibly busy firefighting through the Covid crisis.


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My team and I are working safely from home but we are here to help you as always.

Things seem better now but she’s still working long hours. Our girls, who are six and three, miss her so much.

Any time I mention it, we end up rowing. At home, her phone rings non-stop.

Home-schooling our six-year-old was bad but even now I’m wrung out. I’ve had enough. We don’t feel like a family.

I get more attention from the other mums in the school playground than I do from my own wife.

Being a workaholic is a damaging addiction and there are sometimes underlying emotional drivers.

DEIDRE SAYS: The dynamics have changed since you went from being his lover to his carer. Not taking pride in himself hasn’t helped.

Ask her whether she is happy with the situation and how you could both improve your lives.

Try not to throw accusations as that will only make her defensive. Could she cut her hours so that you can have a part-time job to even things out?

My support pack Teaching Assertiveness Skills will help to get the message across. A relationship is about two people’s needs being satisfied – and you have a voice too.

NEXT IN TODAY'S DEAR DEIDRE Since our daughter was born three years ago, my in-laws have made no effort to see her

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