Great Britain

My wife cheated on me and now I can’t keep my erection when we have sex

CAN'T KEEP UP

DEAR DEIDRE: MY wife cheated on me and now I imagine that other man having sex with her every time we are about to have sex.

It makes me lose my erection.

It was almost two years ago.

We were going through a bad patch and I had my suspicions she wasn’t being faithful.

It’s all over between them and I forgave her, but I’m haunted by it every time we try to have sex.

She says it doesn’t matter but it really is spoiling things between us. We are both 42.

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DEIDRE SAYS: Unhappy feelings do damp down sexual responses and now you are probably worrying about losing your erection – so it’s a vicious circle.

When you start to have sex, determinedly think of your best times together.

Don’t rush to have intercourse but relish every touch and sensation. This will help to build confidence in your responses.

My e-leaflet on Sex Play Therapy explains in detail.

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