Great Britain

I tried to end feud with my sister for my wedding but it’s made things worse


DEAR DEIDRE: MY younger sister and I have never been close, and are now in our late twenties.

But when I got engaged in May 2019 I thought my wedding would be the perfect opportunity to bridge the gap.

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Sadly the opposite has happened. We were meant to get married last November but because of coronavirus we have moved the date to this September.

I asked her to be my maid of honour, thinking she would appreciate it.

She arranged my hen weekend but this also had to be cancelled.

My friends decided to organise a virtual party to spoil me and she was invited. She didn’t even reply.

She later said it clashed with her anniversary. Now she is accusing my friends of cutting her out.

I’ve had a terrible year. I lost my job, have money worries and my dad is really poorly.

My friends were simply trying to cheer me up. I’m not sure I want her as my maid of honour at all now.

DEIDRE SAYS: Think carefully about the bigger picture. Weddings often bring out the tensions in families.

If you exclude her now it would make future relationships more strained – for both of you and your family.

Speak to her to clear the air. You may have very different styles of behaviour.

Perhaps she is more organised and needs to be given specific jobs.

Read my support pack Wedding Worries for advice.

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