Great Britain

White Lines’ hunky bad boy Boxer is every husband’s worst nightmare – and makes Normal People’s Connell look like Bambi

THE gods of television have taken pity on Britain's locked-down women recently - first sending us a gift in the form of Normal People's brooding Irish hunk Paul Mescal.

And now, as we dream of dashed holidays to party islands and exotic adventures, a new pin-up has joined the race for our hearts.

Netflix viewers have been lapping up its smash hit White Lines - and in particular, the hotness provided by Boxer, the Portuguese bad boy played by Nuno Lopes.

I thought I was the only one who had told her husband she had work to do while she finished bingeing the 10-hour series in record time.

But nope, social media is awash with flustered praise.

As nearly 300,000 fans flocked straight to Nuno's Insta page, one swooned "Do I want to run away to Ibiza and move in with Boxer? Yes", while another raved: "Every girl needs a Boxer."

Army of 'Boxer b****es'

For those who don’t know the series yet - wakey, wakey!

Starring Laurence Fox, Daniel Mays and Angela Griffin, White Lines is based around the disappearance of superstar DJ Axel Collins.

When his body is discovered 20 years after he went missing, his sister Zoe (Laura Haddock) gets to hook up with Boxer in Ibiza as she tries to find out what happened.

Duarte 'Boxer' Silva is the head of security for the Calafat family. They own clubs - and control the drugs - on the island.

I watched the series over 48 hours. In 1997 I worked in Ibiza making a tell-all series about the hedonistic side of the island, so I kidded myself that watching it – alone - was “very important research”.

Only a few weeks ago, the nation was going wild for Normal People’s Paul Mescal and his one piece of jewellery, but now we’re spending hours (and hours) refreshing Nuno’s Insta and Twitter feeds as he releases more (and more - whoop!) photos of him on set.

We’re spending hours refreshing Nuno’s Insta and Twitter feeds as he releases more (and more - whoop!) photos of him on set

Samantha Brick

Then there are the countless threads all over the streaming review sites.

Every bloke's worst nightmare

So listen up blokes – do you want to know why we all find him so hot?

Boxer is a walking, talking Danger Man: the tattoos, the jewellery (rings, crucifixes ... I could go on).

Then the bad boy look is underlined by being permanently dressed in black: jeans, shirt, buckle belt, cowboy boots and topped off with Latino looks.

In other words: he is every husband’s worst nightmare.

The reason why so many of us gals are lusting over his, ummm, performance in the series is because he reminds you of every steamy holiday romance you've ever had.

What woman hasn’t - while on a sunny-drenched, scantily-clad holiday - fallen into bed with a bloke with a sexy accent? I know I did – and I married mine.

Laura Haddock's character Zoe is from grey ole Manchester.

Being on Ibiza and around someone so different - the accent, the clothes, the approach to life - it's little wonder she fell hard for him.

The sex scenes between them in episode five are pretty explosive and definitely worth another (and another) watch.

Portuguese men have a track record of stealing our British hearts


But then Portuguese men have a track record of stealing our British hearts: JK Rowling married one the first time round.

Madonna has been making music with Portuguese artists over the last couple of years, while Ronaldo can (and has!) have any woman he wants.

How do I know this? One of my hubby's besties is Portuguese and having spent time in their company I know they can easily seduce a nun.

The most excellent author Karen Wheeler wrote about her affair with one in her brilliant expat series based in France too.

One of my hubby's besties is Portuguese and having spent time in their company I know they can easily seduce a nun


And come on ladies what woman would say no to José Mourinho?

As for me - I only ever watched 2002’s World Cup to spend screen time with Portugal squad player Luís Figo.

The dark eyes, the macho vibe - little wonder White Lines is proving to be a hit – and not for the reason the producers had hoped for.

The only good thing to come out of the pandemic is Boxer.

With talk of an airway being arranged between the UK and Portugal, girls – book a one-way ticket to the country that gave us Mateus Rosé and now Nuno Lopes.

As for season two of White Lines?

I have only one thing to say to its genius creator Alex Pina: “Senhor! The female population of the western world is waiting for your Boxer-filled second series. Rapido, Rapido!”

Netflix’s White Lines cast lift lid on sex parties, Ibiza raves and death-defying stunts in gritty drug thriller

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