Great Britain

My cougar boss won’t commit to a relationship, but wants me to be her booty call

DEAR DEIDRE: I’VE been enjoying steamy hook-ups with my cougar boss. I wanted to make us more official, but I think I’ll only ever be her booty call.

Expensive gifts, romantic weekends away . . . I’ve tried to show her I’ll treat her well, but she doesn’t seem interested in a proper relationship.


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My team and I are working safely from home but we are here to help you as always.

We first got together after I crashed my car one morning on the way to work. I was shaken up and my colleagues called my boss because they were worried.

I’m a 19-year-old guy and a fork-lift truck driver in the warehouse.

I’d never really talked to our boss before. She’s 49 and really fit. She was so kind and took me home.

She messaged me at lunch-time and called in to check on me on her way home.

I invited her in and I sensed the sexual tension between us.

I was brave enough to put my hands on her waist and turn her to face me.

We kissed and she was so responsive to me.

We ended up having sex on my parents’ sofa. I couldn’t believe it was happening to me.

After that, it was sex at her place two or three times every week. It was crazy.

She has three children and a grandchild who was born while we were together. I was planning to go round one evening, but she said she was seeing a school friend.

I assumed it was a woman, but I drove by her house and she was on the doorstep with a man.

She became obsessed with this “friend”, telling everyone at work about him. She messaged me saying they were just friends.

One evening, I called around and she was out with her friend again, but her daughter was there.

She said: “Why have you fallen for her? She’s always been a serial cheat.” I felt crushed.

I’ve told her I want to take her to Paris for her 50th birthday. It makes no difference. I think we are over.

DEIDRE SAYS: Yes, sadly, it sounds like you are. She’s used you, but you deserve better.

It was always going to be a challenge to fit yourself into her family. You don’t want to be the talk of the staff room either.

Tell her it’s been wonderful, but you’re ready for something more than just sex now. She’ll appreciate you ending things properly, where she couldn’t.

Keep busy in the evenings and leave work on time, so you don’t look available.

My support pack called Mend Your Broken Heart will help you too.

NEXT IN TODAY'S DEAR DEIDRE Since our daughter was born three years ago, my in-laws have made no effort to see her

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