Great Britain

I had unbelievable sex with a girl from work but my ex is now back in touch

DEAR DEIDRE: I HAD unbelievable sex with a girl from work after a night out with some colleagues. But I’m torn, as my ex now wants us to get back together.

I work for a big pharmaceutical supplies company and this girl joined my team at the beginning of the year. She’s 22 and I’m 31.

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I had been living with my then-girlfriend for three years and was ready to settle down but she started going out with friends every night and saying I was stuffy and boring. In the end she dumped me.

It was obvious I was down and the new girl at work made a real effort to cheer me up.

Our team always goes out on Thursday nights and she would seek me out — until one evening I realised she was flirting with me.

She came back with me that night. The sex was mind-blowing.

She is a great girl and we get on brilliantly.

We worked through lockdown so still saw one another.

Now we can go out again, she always ends up back at mine but we haven’t said anything about a relationship.


RELATE and the University of Worcester are studying the impact of the pandemic on relationships and family life.

They want to hear from key workers in particular.

I was wondering about a future with her but we are at different stages in our lives, as she is so much younger.

I want to buy a house and have kids, while she is into living life and going out.

What brought it all to a head was my ex getting back in touch.

She says she made the biggest mistake of her life ending it with me and wants to try again.

She is 30 and I’ve never stopped thinking about her.

People used to see us as the perfect couple and I loved her family like my own.

Now I’m in turmoil, stuck between the two girls.

I used to adore my ex and she was my everything until she started all this carrying on.

I could see myself having kids with her.

I could see that with this new girl, too, but I don’t feel we will last.

I never imagined being in this position and I can’t stop it going round and round in my head.

DEIDRE SAYS: You have made no commitment to the new girl, so why not at least explore things with your ex?

But don’t get back with her without understanding what went wrong before and feeling confident you won’t get back into the same cycle.

What led her to behave the way she did?

Was she panicking about turning 30 and, now she has, can she feel more positive about settling down?

If she doesn’t convince you, it is best to say you really are over – and to see if your colleague is interested in starting a relationship.

But do be careful. That virus is still around. 

If a relationship with a colleague goes wrong, it can badly complicate life at work.

But it is even worse if you have also given them coronavirus or have been infected yourself.

READ DEIDRE'S CLASSIC PHOTO CASEBOOK Gemma catches her boyfriend's dad mid sex chat & thinks he's a perv

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